Mistakes Wot I Have Seen.... Cotoneaster over a shingle drive

 

This is not a Mistake Wot I Have Made, as I didn't personally plant or recommend planting a large Cotoneaster alongside a shingled drive.... but it's worth mentioning in passing, that this is an unwise choice of planting.

Why?

Well, this is the sort of Cotoneaster in question:

 

There are many different species of Cotoneaster, this one is, I think, Cotoneaster x waterii which is one of the larger-growing, evergreen ones, which grows into a small tree, usually with nicely arching, overhanging branches.

It is generously covered in bright red berries, making a wonderful show in autumn and through into winter.......

 

 

 

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Forget-me-Not: it's that time of year again!

 Yes, it's the time of year when we gardeners find ourselves covered with masses of tiny Forget-me-Not seeds:

These are my gloves, after an hour of weeding yesterday morning: and no, they are not supposed to be speckled, those are the seeds...

The front of my fleece was likewise liberally covered in the little blighters, and my socks were unspeakable: when I got home, I just flung them in the washing machine along with everything else I was wearing, along with a promise to myself that I would find out where the mysterious "fluff trap" of my washing machine actually was located, and would empty it. Apparently other people do this all the time? Every six weeks? 

Well, I've had this machine for at least ten years, so it's probably time I found out where the fluff trap lives, and emptied it....

Moving on...

 

 

To see a longer article about how to remove Forget-me-Not with style and ease, please hop over to Patreon.

 

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Muscari: this time it's War!!

 I hate these flowers.

Yes, I know that they look lovely in that photo, but in real life, they never look quite that nice, they are actually tiny, and photos never show the stringy, ratty foliage... and somehow, photos never convey the relentless self-seeding that these little beasts indulge in.

In case you are wondering, I am talking about the perennial bulb, Muscari armeniacum, commonly known as Grape Hyacinth. Or “The Scourge of South Oxfordshire”, as I call them......

 

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Roses are things of beauty: or are they?

 Not always... take a look at these, found during a garden visit a couple of years ago:

I mean, just look at them! What colour are they supposed to be? Dirty Blue? Gruesome Lilac? Tainted white?

I love roses, but not like this..... it reminds me of that bit in Jurassic Park....

 

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Giant Hogweed - horrible stuff!

There's been some interest lately about Giant Hogweed, a plant which can cause serious injury to children and adults. 

 It is not the only commonly-growing plant which can hurt, annoy, or injure us: but it is one of the worst!

If you are not sure what it looks like, or how to recognise it, here is the answer - for less than a fiver! (Or FREE if you have Kindle Unlimited) 

 Available from Amazon Kindle, here: Horrors of the Hedgerow   and don't worry if you don't have a Kindle, Amazon kindly provide a free option to download it to your PC, phone, or tablet:

There, on the right-hand side, it's called "Read on your device" and it's a quick, simple, free little app (or "programme" as we grown-ups say), which allows you to download it to any device, not just a Kindle.

I've ringed it in red, so that you can find it!
 

So don't delay, download it now, read it, show it to your children, then get outdoors and enjoy the countryside without having to worry about accidentally encountering this plant - once you know what it looks like, you can avoid it!

 

 

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Compost - hamster bedding? Chicken bedding? No thank you!

One of my friends recently started receiving donations to their compost pens - their daughter has hamsters, and a couple of chickens, and (for some unknown reason) does not have a composting arrangement of her own, and therefore asked to dump the cleanings onto their parents' compost pens.

My friends were so proud of having sawdust, chopped straw and assorted poo, to add to their compost pens: “Oh, it'll make brilliant compost, won't it?!” they exclaimed excitedly.

I was not quite so excited...

 

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Mossy wooden steps - not quite gardening, but...

When does it stop being gardening and start being something else? And, does it really matter?

Over the years, I've done all sorts of things, for my various Clients, which were not, strictly speaking, gardening.

Another one cropped up last week: these wooden steps are steep, narrow, and their fan shape (whilst very attractive) makes them quite tricky to negotiate.....

 

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